
Things are progressing, for the most part. Today, I sat down with Janet and we talked about my future and how I'm not going to college next fall, and that I need as many hours as possible this summer. I also talked about training and running the photo-lab at another store, and then she told me I have the opportunity to become a pharmacist. I'm totally taking that opportunity when I turn 18, even though I'll have to transfer stores and take classes (fully paid by CVS) and leave my home store. I can't pass this up, it's really a great option for me. The pay is amazing, the hours are as well, and I like medicine and things of that sort. I'm excited for this.
I'm finally mastering (slightly) black and white infared photography. The only problem I've run into is that there is a white flare in the middle of every photo taken with the filter due to my camera being anti-infared and having a blocking sensor for it. I'd really like to use the filter on my Nikon FG because there is no sensor to block the rays. But, experimenting that much right now with film would be dumb and a waste of money until I get the hang of it more.
I've got my 7/16s in now, after much struggle over the weekend with painful tapering, and a minor blow-out on each ear. The swelling has finally went down, and it's beginning to heal. If I wanted to stretch further, I'd have to wait a month or two to prevent tearing, but I don't know if I'm going to go larger or not. Peircings are like an obsession to me, I love stretching my lobes. It's just something to do to alter my body, and I'm fully aware that stretching is considered permanent.
I'm VERY broke. Once I get my check Saturday, it's being saved. I've realized I need a goal to reward to actually save money. Tonight, Tony asked me where all my money went, and the only thing I could tell him was towards food and my $45 birth control each month. I did just spend a lot of money to do my strech, and there was a birthday party the weekend before, but besides that, I just spend my money on useless shit. I'm saving up for a $300 videocamera, now.
The weather is getting really nice, so I've been going out more. I went out yesterday and did a walk with Ray in Newburyport (Maudslay State Park) and we experienced wildlife up close, which was cool. I also got some photos, and burned off (some) of the calories I gained from the half of a large pizza I ate with chicken fingers. Gross, I feel so discusting.
Next Tuesday I'm going up to Bangor, Maine, for a suprise birthday party. My great grandma is turning 99 and her old people community is holding a suprise party for her. She's the oldest person in Abbott, Maine. She had a bad fall recently, and was hospitalized and was on the verge on pnemonia. She was supposed to come down next week, but she's in no condition for that. So, we'll go to her. I don't mind, I love that area of Maine.
I think I might go out again tomorrow. I'm doing vitually nothing in class due to all the Juniors doing some thing for two days. Fourth block tomorrow, we're ordering pizza (oh god, not more) and sitting outside and having a picnic. Today, we blew up gummy bears. Oh, Chemisty.
Lilly got hurt today. We thought she broke her leg because my tubby sister stepped right in the middle of her leg. She went to the vet and nothing was broken, but she can't walk right and in a tremendous deal of pain.
I'm listless, and feeling ignored again. I wish when I wrote things and you read them and felt differently, you'd sit me down and talk about it instead of making me feel like you never saw it. And I wish when you admitted you read it, you'd say more than 'I know you don't like to talk about that stuff' and say I was obviously wrong. How was I wrong? Prove it to me, explain it to me. Do something because even though I felt better, it didn't mean those thoughts were free from my mind. Because they weren't, and they haven't been, and I'm starting to feel not so crazy for feeling the way I do because the way you even handled the situtation and my emotions proved that what I felt wasn't so wrong, like you said. And this whole thing is just making me implode within myself.
No comments:
Post a Comment