Die young and save yourself.

Life is rather exciting, I guess. The more work that is done to Ray's truck, the more I adopt fucking with trucks into my hobby list. Hah. We fixed it today outside Autozone in the freezing wind, but it was so worth it, even though I broke a piece and ripped my leggins. His truck runs amazing now. We raced a lot tonight, which I get so excited about. I love it. I'm going to be fucked when I get a truck, if I can ever afford one. I'll definitely be working two jobs if I do. Hah. Fucked.

As always, I'm living weekend to weekend. Hopefully, with the weather getting nice, I'll be out a lot more during the week. I've been trying to work as much as possible, and I got about four days in this week, counting tomorrow. I need the money desperately. I just paid my Dad off for the $170 cellphone bill because the texting AT&T has is fucked. I still owe him next month's, urg. We'll see how that goes. So I'm dead broke, until next Friday. I need to save, though. It's really important.

I don't know what I'm going to do about college. I really want to wait until next year, when I can afford it better, because if I go now, I'll be paying student loans off for the rest of my life. I want to sign up for NECCO this year, instead of rushing into the art institute, because being an art major is really the biggest mistake you can make in life. I just want to be sure of myself. I'm not right now. I need to test the waters, too bad that's expensive. Stressed.

I love the balls people have to ask me randomly, after not talking to me for months, if they can borrow something of mine so they can save money. Honestly, I've had nothing to due with you, and I don't want to make it seem like I'm cool with you, because I'm not. The things you said to me hurt me, and angered me. Why do you just decide, after a few months, that we can be cool again. Fuck that shit, dude.

I'm just down, but not severely or anything. I just don't feel much energy exerted at my right now, especially from people who matter a lot to me. Show me I'm important, show me you think about me. I've been giving so much lately, and I'm not complaining, but now that I haven't been, I've stopped hearing how great I am, or important.

I have work tomorrow morning, I should probably get heading to bed.